Are horses pets? If not, what do you consider them to be?

Recently a non-horsey friend asked me if I thought of my horse as a pet and the question completely threw me! What do people think? Is your horse a pet? If not, what is he/she? We buy and sell them like commodities, we 'use' them for sport, we breed from them (does that make them 'livestock'?) and in some countries we eat them (although I guess no-one who comes on this forum would be doing that!). So ... what are they to us?

I'd love to hear your views!

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This is why I do not believe in "playing" with horses. When horses play with each other there is a lot of running, kicking biting, etc.. I am too frail to put up with this type of behavior. The only type of play I do with my horse involves me riding him under MY control, "playing" with the horse's balance and extensions. Much safer for me, and the horses seem to think that this is an acceptable substitute, because when horses play they usually MOVE vigorously.
Your horse may not MEAN to kick you in the head (or anywhere else) but that does not make the injuries any less severe. And in the long run, unless you can guarantee that the horse will never be handled by anyone else, the horse trying to "play" with people will end up labeled as unmanageable and unsafe. It is much safer for everyone if both horse and human keep to the time tested ways of interaction (training, riding and driving). Our ancestors handled a lot more horses than we tend to, and they often knew what they were doing. And they rarely "played" with their horses. In fact it was sort of considered poor horsemanship to do so, as it encourages disrespect from the horse.
I do "play" with my horse... but I always establish firm boundaries. In reality it is actually training, but to a casual observer it could look like I am just playing with my horse... which is why I never do it in front of some of my non-rider (but horse loving) friends. It is too easy to overlook the subtle communication that is taking place, and I don't want my friends to think that it is safe to just go and play with a loose horse. It does take careful training and vigilance to safely work with/around a horse. What is an appropriate activity depends a lot on the individual horse and horseperson.

I do call my horse to me, but he has already learned that he comes near me, but not right up to me. He does not enter my space uninvited... he generally stops and then I step into his space. I am dominant so I call the shots. Do I hug my horse? Yes, but again I initiate it (I step into his space, he is never to push into me), and he is learning to keep his head low when I am near him. He has learned that I can scratch him, but he is not allowed to "groom" me in return, nor is he to use me as a scratching post.

Do we go for strolls together? Yes, lots... but as relaxed and fun as our strolls are, I am always watching his body language (and he mine). Do we trot together... yes, but he always stays out of my space and is never permitted to rush past me. Every training session we also explore 'toys'.

He sometimes likes to go for a good buck when I turn him out after work... but he does not run and buck until after he is out in the middle of the pasture, away from all humans. We are carefully working on him patiently waiting for his halter to be removed, after which he calmly leaves our vicinity before 'letting loose'.

I like knowing that I can work with my horse at liberty, because if for some reason a piece of tack breaks and he gets loose, I know that he can calmly walk with me with nothing more than a rope, if anything at all. He is also becoming even more amazing when walking with a lead. Because I have established myself as dominant we are developing a good relationship. Do I make mistakes... or course... but he lets me know when I do. We are teaching each other. ;)

If something scares him he now tends to look to me for confidence, rather than just bolting away... which is a result of our careful work together. His respect and his acceptance of me as a good leader is the best gift that he will ever give me... and I express my gratitude by being the best leader than I can be.
Sounds like you are doing real good with your horse.
Actually I do not worry about if the horse is saying he is over me--ie. head rubbing, request for scratches. If a horse asks me POLITELY--no sudden moves or hard nudges, I don't really mind. In fact, with my first horse I would offer him my shoulder so he could rub his head after I took off the bridle, and there was never any disagreement over who was boss--me. However, if the horse is rude I cut him off, if he tries to persist I scold--horses don't seem to like me shaking my finger in their faces, if more I might yank the lead rope. I just set boundaries, but as I said, a polite horse can go a little further.
And you are perfectly correct to say it takes a lot of training of the handler before it is safe to "play" with your horse. And you are also right to call it training, because that is what you do every time you handle a horse even if it looks like play.
Just like you I worry that people will get starry eyed and start thinking that horses will be nice and play politely with just anybody, whether the horse knows them or not.
And I think that people need to get to an understanding with each horse about what is what in the relationship. That way they know much better what to do.
Again, it sounds like you are developing a good relationship with your horse, keep up with the good work. Are you also riding him?
Thanks Jackie, I am thrilled with my little lad (my first youngster). It sounds like we think in similar ways... I agree completely. If a horse is polite then I am quite willing to give a needed scratch (especially now while the flies are still quite bad).

At the moment I am being quite firm about boundaries and personal space because my boy is quite young (two) and still learning. I am not planning to back him until he is three. We are currently doing LOTS of groundwork, and I have been putting pads on his back and having him stand at the mounting block while I lean lightly over him... so hopefully backing will be a non-event when it does happen. Thankfully, in the meantime I do have access to other horses to ride, and I also take lessons on schoolmasters.
I believe for those of us who are able to establish boundaries from the ground, it is totally the way to go, and for me, my relationship with Ben is so much better than it would have been if I hadn't been able to do it all from the ground. But it's been hard work and if I wanted to take it to the next level, it would take a physically 'bigger' person than I am. So ... we have reached an impasse and we are where we are. Which is ok. However I don't allow him to scratch on me and I don't allow him to push into me. It's a fine line we are constantly treading. If there is scratching to be done, I do it to him and not vice versa. I guess the issue here is that every relationship with every horse is different.

Ferrous, it sounds fantastic what you are doing - your horse sounds very fortunate.

I witnessed someone kick a youngster in the stomach yesterday for not standing still while she tried to 'fix' his bridle - because he pushed his shoulder into her and turned his head away as she aggressively coming at his head - I know I can't save all the horses in the world ... but it's a daily challenge... !

They are more than pets to some of us, but to other people they don't even qualify as anything other than objects to be used and abused. :-(
I live in Los Angeles California and this has been a very hectic week... watching the forest fires burn near my home...... never in my week of stress and worry did I ever not consider all 11 of my creatures.... my little tiny bird to my Mustang Oliver as ever in worry of being left behind, cats and dogs too.... I've agonized over finding a trailer, where will I go if I do have to evacuate? I've come AGAIN to a very big discovery... these animals, all 11 of them are my family..... come one come all..... my responsibility, obligation... just as much to me as a human child, I do not shirk my life time commitment to all of my animals..... :)

I learn all the time better and more effective ways of playing with my horses..... I love to play but I agree with Jackie... my horse is not suited for anyone else.... that is all I can say.
Interesting discussion, and some very insightful responses. Is my horse a pet? I guess she must be because as livestock she no longer has any real monetary value. As a companion, she is priceless. Our relationship is a complex one of give and take. Does she see me as alpha - no I'm not a horse. Does she respect me? Yes. Does she trust me? Yes. Does she enjoy spending time with me? Yes. I equate our relationship as a partership. We have laid the ground rules to what is acceptible behaviour on both sides. For example, she is not pushy with me and I do not hug her - ever (ok, but only when she's under anesthetic and is too out of it to notice).

Because we ask more of our horses (usually) than simply companionship, it goes beyond the pet relationship. The communication and trust required to work together to complete the complex tasks we ask of our horses requires a far more "mentally intimate" bond than simply pet.

If this isn't difficult enough, there are special horses among the horses. Like our relationships with other humans, some are co-workers, some are friends and if we are lucky, some transcend into relationships that are magical. These are the ones that touch our very souls.
My first horse Hat Tricks was an angel from heaven. Yes, he touched my soul and he made me a lot better person.
Although technically they are pets.... i don't really like to call them that. I don't think of them that way. They are members of my family. What they offer with their companionship seems degraded by a term like pet. Unfortunately, I can't think of any better word than family.



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Yes, I would agree that my horses have also been members of the family over the years. My relationship with my old mare outlasted many friends/boyfriends and a couple of husbands, too! :-) Plus I've cried more tears and had more sleepless nights over my horses than any of the men in my life that is for sure!

I agree that 'pet' could be seen as degrading term for them. I like 'family'... lots of my decisions in life have revolved around my horse(s), so they are probably my child substitutes or something. Some people would not move to an area if they couldn't find a good school for the kids - I wouldn't go if I couldn't find the right place for my horse(s) to live.
I had quite a few women, when they first got to know my first horse Hat Tricks, turn to me with tears in their eyes and saying "why can't he be a man, I'd marry him in a heart beat!"
Wonderful reply...very insightful, many thanks Sharon.

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