The Horse I got for Christmas is really herd-bound.

She's SUCH a sweety, until the other Horses leave, then she's really antsy, and doesn't want to stand still. I had to be all mean, and snappy on the lead-rope, and by the time I left, she barely wanted to eat the apple I was offering.

I won't be riding her until may or june, so I've got some time, and a little area (probably a 20 metre circle size) to lung.

Any training suggestions? I really need some help.

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Jocelyn -


That is fantastic! I'm glad you had a positive turnout with this :) There's always room for improvement but it sounds like you've got a start.

See if you can try join-up again, and this time (if the weather conditions are permitting) try to push her away until she gives you the cues you need. As Monty says, "if you're going to go away, don't go away a little, go away a lot!" - Try to keep her going until she gives you all the signs (ear locked on, lowering head, chewing/licking, and eventually making smaller circles meaning she wants to be close to you and shes  testing you out). If you can get these things from her and then get a join-up and a follow-up, your connection with her is bound to increase tenfold.

I'm so glad that you've had a positive experience with this on your first try. I've heard quite a few people have bad experiences (can't get a join-up/follow-up, can't get any signs at all, etc etc) so it's nice to see you ended up happy and your mare is content.

Keep us posted, please! :)


Thanks, I'll be doing a join-up again on Saturday and Sunday!! I'll be persisting for all the signs too!!! =D


I went to groom her last night, and she was SUCH a different Horse, it was great!!


Thanks... I will.

Dear Jocelyn:  Hi..... Congratulations on your new horse..... there are many conversations, in fact one on here about if join up is good for a horse or not..... and even what that is, but I am really happy that you are at least trying it..... bonding with a horse can take a long long time... my horse Oliver had never been around other horses before and although he grew up with me now for 5 years, he was very curious about new horses when I started boarding some at my place..... my point is that I practiced and practiced with him and now last week, he was in with a mare, he got into her stall when someone left her door open and I'll be darned if I didn't just call his name and ask him to come to me and he did... he left her..... it can happen, so don't you give up... she'll be in your pocket before you know it.... I truly believe in long term relationships with horses....  the joining up conversations are under a community called "body Language".... it's a bit back and forth.... I do think Joining Up is where it's at, but mostly, just spending time with her..... :)  they spend more time with their horsey friends than they do with us so it seems natural that they would prefer to be with their friends than their teacher.... :)

That's great! =D


Thanks so much for the reply!!

Is that the photo of you two?  What a pretty pair you are...... she seems very sweet and willing..... from what we have learned in the body language thread that I told you about...

Jocelyn, Before you try the MOnty Roberts "join-Up" please look at the other comments on here about that method. There is a lot of good thoughts of pros and cons on this subject. Do your homework before exposing your horse.

I agree with what others have said here that it takes time to bond with your horse. I personally think it is very important  to not ever be mean with them. Sometimes you have to discipline them to keep both of you safe but try to always do so in a fair way & avoid potential bad situations so you can establish a good relationship and grow in your partnership. Baby steps and taking the time it takes will help you to find success. I think it is helpful to spend time with them just being together...spend some time in the pasture with him, mosey somewhere close where u can allow him to graze, some of my friends sit and drink their morning coffee and maybe read a book for a while with their horse. Not everyone can do that but you might be able to do something similar that fits into your schedule.

Any good friendship takes lots of time and effort. Our horse friendships aren't much different.


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