Rusty Riders and those lacking confidence


Rusty Riders and those lacking confidence

This group is for riders lacking confidence or have ridden before, had an accident and can't get back on or have just not had the time and have gotten a little "rusty".

Location: Gweek Riding Center, Telkwa, B.C.
Members: 26
Latest Activity: Jul 1, 2014

Discussion Forum

How do I get the confidence to ride again? 7 Replies

Started by Barbara Chapel. Last reply by Shirley Apr 10, 2010.

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Comment by Barbara Sky Horse on June 30, 2009 at 4:48pm
...*yelling so as to be heard*...
HELLOoooOOOOooo Coopersmom!!!

Welcome to Rusty Riders!!!
I was just over having a nosey at your profile / my page.
You have Another One of those Wonderful stories that Definitely NEEDS to be in the Partnership and Courage Contest!!!
((((((((hugs ya))))))) for having at least 1000 x MORE courage and "Can Do / Will Do" spirit then I ever dreamed of having!!
My Hat's Off To You!!
And Wooooo Hooooo!! ... You have a Draft Cross!! :-)
How are you doing with his schooling??
~ Barby
Comment by Barbara Sky Horse on June 30, 2009 at 12:27pm
Hello There Kelly!!!
Sincere Thanks for sharing and Again....Welcome to "Rusty Riders"!!

Yup, I remember the days waaaaaaaaay back when .. when I really KNEW I could Ride ANY horse I got on!! And I Did!!
And on the occasions I came off .. it was no big deal what so ever!!
You just jumped up, hurried to brush the dirt off, and get Back On!!

My only worry back then, was Extreme Embarrassment IF someone SAW Me Come off!!! ;-)
( I often laugh, thinking back .. remembering some of those horses and rides, and Gratefully and Sincerely "Thank the Great Spirit" ..knowing Guardian Angels are the ONLY reason I'm here today!! )

.... but that was then ... we're talking about Today!!
Yup, like You, I'm more Horse Crazy then Ever Today!!
But ... I also have this ever present little core "insecurity" about all the "What Ifs"
What if I can't control the ride? .. What if I Can't remember all the "How To‘s" ... What if I simply can't get "IT" Right??
What if I fall off? .. What if my horse falls??
.. heck ... I worry about "What if I can't get on .. and ... what if I LOOK foolish while I ride!!"

Over our Natural years, for what ever reason ... physically we just aren't what we used to be ... lol ... sad how that happens ...isn't it??
We're not as balanced, we don't bend and flex with that same childhood willow like grace ... our hurts (emotional, mental, a well as physical)
Don't heal Nearly as fast as they used to!!
Yup Kelly ... I worry to, about coming off and breaking a bone (or what ever ) ... knowing that "Today" .. it's a Big Deal!!

Ok .... those are all of my "Honest" and "Genuine" negative fears and insecurities.

But the "Positive / Can Do" side of me says .... "I’m Positive that We CAN
Do This Kelly!!
We CAN Get back to not only Riding … But Excelling in What Ever Direction We Decide to Go!!

I think some personal “Keys” for me will definitely involve a better daily “Get In Shape” routine. And at my age “Weight Loss / Control” is a real challenge, but I Know it’s Possible … and Absolutely Vital for a better … more balanced .. More In Control ride!!
(and let’s not forget more “Fair” with regards to my 4-legged partner)

Kelly, you said that Recently You’ve taken up Dressage??
May I ask, is that On your own?? … or are you taking lessons and riding with a coach?

It’s in my mind that as a “Rusty Rider” …it’s going to be Important to find the RIGHT Coach … someone who will understand … but NOT coddle me.
A coach who will know When … and how hard to Push me
( …*laughing* … suppose I can find one of those?? )

But I do think that taking some lessons, on a dependable School Horse, under the watchful eye of a knowledgeable, scrutinizing Instructor … would probably be the VERY Best thing that “Rusty Riders” can do to ensure the best possible Start .. To making our Come Back!!
~ Barby
( …lol .. I promise … I AM trying to learn to shorten my responses )
Comment by Still Green on June 29, 2009 at 11:04pm
Hi Barby and Cindy,

My name is Kelly and I am also a rusty rider. I use to ride western and bareback as a child and into my teens. I had no real training. Recently I have taken up Dressage. I think I am more horse crazy than before! Now there is a difference.... I am more scared than before. In the back of my mind I always recognize that I could fall and break something...when I was younger I thought that I could ride any horse and I would be in control. When I did fall it was no big deal. Now, not so much....I am starting slow and really really enoying myself and yet the fear is always in the back of my mind. A couple of weeks ago the horse I was riding stumbled really badly and I landed on his neck. The fear is ringing louder in my ears now. This weekend I had the honor of participating in a clinic with Frank Grelo and he told me that I was spookier than any of the horses and that there was no wolf that was going to come out and eat me!!! I laughed and laughed but he was right. I am working on it and know that tomorrow is another day where I can make more progress and just try to get over it so I can concentrate more on my riding and the big boy in the picture to get to where I want to be.


I wanted to let you know that your courage was tremendous and when I ride I will think of you and what you have accomplished. How can I justify my ittybitty fear when you were able to do what you did? You are truly remarkable. I am always in awe when I see someone accomplish their dreams especially through such difficult times. Carpe Diem! Your children and grandchildren are very lucky to have you!

Good luck on the transition and transformation at Gweek riding center. (An evolution in the dream that is being realised.) I can't wait to hear all about it.

By the way I have to agree with Barby your blog does belong in the PARTNERSHIP and COURAGE contest.

Cindy thank you also for starting such a great group!
Comment by Barbara Sky Horse on June 29, 2009 at 11:30am
((((((sincere Hugs))))))
Your last post belongs in the PARTNERSHIP and COURAGE Contest!!
(but also perfect fit here ... it offers the BEST kind of Courage for "Rusty Riders"!!)
*thinking about it* ....
Isn’t it wonderful .. That everyday is a New day in our lives!!
With the opportunity to Change Direction, and go from where we’re NOT happy .. to Finding the path that WILL take us ,,, where Ever We Want Go!!
Good For You Cindy!!
(you're a wonderful inspiration!!)
~ Barby
…. May the Great Spirit hold You and Yours Extra Close … ALWAYS!!
Comment by Cindy Jeffery on June 28, 2009 at 10:31pm
I gave up my dream to own horses, have a ranch and teach others about horses when my first husband and I had children in close succession 18 months apart. Oh there were promises and there were horses that I rode, but nothing like living and breathing horses. He was supportive of having horses but every penny we had went to the illegal drug industry and even though I loved him I took the kids and ran. We went through a lot of bad stuff to the point of them going to a foster home till I was able to support them again. After getting them back we left the town we were all born in and started new, I divorced their father and married a man who told me horses were great and he wouldn't mind having them someday. I was delighted and my oldest and I went looking for horses. She found 2 Rangerbred Appaloosa's for $200 a piece ('80's). We brought them home and that was the start of 29 years of many wonderful horses who put in their time to build Gweek Morgans and Riding Center where we bred morgans and taught lessons. Recent years we have morphed into Gweek Riding Center where people of all ages come and learn about horses, horsemanship and stable management. Currently we are getting ready for another change and aim towards trail riding, holidays with your horse, public camping and a more focused Horsemanship School covering all aspects of horsemanship. So now in my late fifties I am still working and living in my dream.
Comment by Cindy Jeffery on June 28, 2009 at 10:16pm
Well I think there are very few coach/instructor/trainers out there that really want to take the time with people who struggle with this. To me everyone needs a chance and the "rusty rider" is someone who used to be very good at riding. I'm finding for myself I just need a chance and have been giving myself that, not expecting anything great and wonderful, but just to be around my horse, smelling their smell, touching their coat and just hugging them if they allow it. All that gives me such a sense of well being. Most people show their horses or aim to show their horses which demands a whole different mind set then just "hanging out" with your horse. If the "rusty rider" is older like you and me Barby we can give ourselves permission to not be so competitive that we have to rush around trying to do what the younger riders do. We can give our selves permission to go slow because we've been there, done it all before, out horse is trained and is our team member and knows every nuance of our movement and voice. We can be confident that when we go on a trail ride or arena ride or horse show we will be successful. Even if that success is just getting into the show ring or maybe even just getting to the show. We can realize as tiny as our successes maybe to others they are huge to us and we can own it.
Comment by Barbara Sky Horse on June 28, 2009 at 2:26pm
Ohhh My Gosh Cindy!!!

You hit the nail BANG ON Sistah!! ;-)
Life can, and does Indeed Get in the way of our dreams, which are then set aside in Pursuit of that which seems more important.
( .. *laughing* .. that "Reality" .. it's a killer, innit?? )
And in putting away those hopes and dreams, and early goals … I Really Believe that We DO Grieve for them … and I honestly can see where that grief can become a biting little root of bitterness that over time, grows into a myriad of other Negative emotion which comes bubbling up through the core of our being …and as you pointed out … can well reveal its self in the form of “Depression” … deep seated and ugly ….genuinely colouring all other aspects of our lives!!
…lol … anyway, that’s the way it happened for me …*wink*

You brought up something else Cindy that for me, Really touched a personally sensitive aspect.
I Know that the Very BEST Thing I could do to start making my comeback, is to go find a Good Coach!!
But …
I’m genuinely worried about not really being taken seriously … of running into an attitude of … “just humour the poor old dear”
In my current “horse shopping” … I already Have encountered a sampling of Just That!!
…..grrrrrrr… it’s irritating as hades!!

So let me ask You Cindy, how do YOU “Honestly” feel about we “older / out of shape / wannbe serious again” riders??
And what / where do You recommend riders such as myself begin???

I’m also hoping there are other “Instructors” who will take a minute to comment here about how they maybe feel about “Older” riding students.
Those of us who Genuinely want to “Get back to What they Love”

I’m Excited about Other “Rusty Riders” finding this group, hoping they’ll feel comfortable about sharing where they’ve been… and where they want to go, …. be able to ask for help, and get Genuine encouragement for re-aligning and developing some NEW hopes, dreams, and goals!!

Thanks again for this “Group” Cindy!!
~ Barby
Comment by Cindy Jeffery on June 28, 2009 at 3:13am
Thanks Barby! I was hoping we could all encourage each other to not give up on our dreams of riding horses or owning a horse again. I've had women later in life come to me for lessons (again) they used to ride when they were younger but husbands, children and work take over the horse dream. The loss of that dream is huge and people can grieve seriously for it, so much so it causes deep depression. I'm hoping we can uplift and encourage each other.
Comment by Barbara Sky Horse on June 27, 2009 at 10:20pm
....*waving to Still Green* ....
HelloOOOoooo ... glad to see another Member in here ;-)
~ Barby
Comment by Barbara Sky Horse on June 27, 2009 at 2:42pm
HelloOOOoo Cindy!!
...*waving* ...
I think This Is An AWESOME Idea for a Group!!
I'm not lacking in confidence, but after almost 2 decades away from riding ... *laughing* ... I am Waaaaaaaaaay Rusty!!!
... but you know, reading the "group description" ... loads of people I know leapt to mind, and here's me thinking I need to get busy and get them invited to barnmice in general .. but especially HERE to the "Rusty Riders"
Way To Go Cindy ... for starting THIS Group!!
Loads of "Positive" potential here ;-)
~ Barby

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