Sometimes the biggest step to success is the one we take through the arena door.

Right now I have a big personal goal - to ride my young, athletic, spooky horse out in the forest next summer in the annual charity ride.

Thinking about that goal is overwhelming. If I put that pressure on myself every time I walk to the arena I know I would easily become discouraged. One cold windy day last week I couldn't settle him enough to put his bridle on, to say nothing of riding him in the forest!

While it is good to have a vision of some day galloping our horses across open fields or down forest trails, such a vision can at times seem unreachable. By setting our goals too high we can put too much pressure on ourselves, decrease our chances of being successful, destroy our confidence and take away the enjoyment of being with our horses.

I need to be motivated to make that long walk up the driveway to my arena. We all know how easy it is to come up with a hundred and one excuses not to spend time with our horse. I know that what gets me past the excuses, what motivates me is success. Success builds my confidence and moves me enthusiastically forward.

I can be successful every time I work with my horse if I set my goals carefully and break them down into manageable steps. As a teacher of thirty-five years I have learned that sometimes the most effective way of getting from A to Z is to stop at every other letter along the way.

Last year I was having some leadership/confidence issues with Bob, one of my young horses. I felt I needed to ride him every time I worked with him but, as our rides were less than positive experiences I began to avoid them and him. I knew I would have to rethink my strategies or Bob would end up as a very handsome lawn ornament.

For the next several months I set myself the goal of going to the arena three times a week just to spend time with Bob. Taking away the pressure of having to ride got me through the that door. Once there I kept my goals very small to ensure success.

I always started the sessions with groundwork. If (and only if) that was successful and I felt good about it I worked at the mounting block; this is where our troubles often began. If we did well there I would get on and go for a short walk. Very gradually our walks became longer and more energetic until we we soon able to trot confidently once more. In the beginning I spent many sessions only on the ground or just at the mounting block, but it really didn't matter where I was in relation to my horse; all that mattered was that our relationship was improving.

Occasionally Bob and I would have a less than positive session. When that happened I backtracked to the point where I knew we could work successfully. I knew that ending on a high note would take us both further in our next session.

You can break down your experiences with your horse into the smallest steps you need to feel successful. You are accountable to no one other than yourself for your progress. You alone can find the balance between stretching your limits but not getting too far out of your comfort zone.

You will be surprised to find out that going slower will get you where you want to be a lot faster.

Next post - Practice, practice and more practice