All Blog Posts Tagged 'humor' (18)

Cheer up! It’s all your fault.

We’ve all been there: Schooling our horse, asking for something, but not getting the right answer. We try one thing and then another, the work is sticky so we try a bit harder. At the same time, the horse feels a bit more resistant.

“This wasn’t just plain terrible, this was fancy terrible. This was terrible with raisins in it.”  -Dorothy Parker.

But then…

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Added by Anna Blake on August 31, 2012 at 8:32am — 1 Comment

I notice that no one is asking me for beauty tips.

I have been blogging along for a couple of years now and I notice that no one is asking me for beauty tips. I wonder why that is?

It couldn’t be that I offended with last week’s rant about non-helmet wearing riders who have more concern about their hair than their brains.

It can’t be a grudge about the blog where I referred to my truck as The Perfect Purse, that was…

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Added by Anna Blake on January 13, 2012 at 8:25am — 2 Comments

How to be Gracious

 

Hi all,

Here's a great joke to head into the weekend with!

 

How to be Gracious



>  Jennifer's wedding day was fast approaching. Nothing could dampen her

> excitement - not even her parent's nasty divorce.

>

>  Her mother had found the PERFECT dress to wear, and would be the

> best-dressed mother-of-the-bride ever!  A week later, Jennifer was horrified

> to learn that her father's new, young wife…

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Added by Barbara F. on October 21, 2011 at 4:29pm — 1 Comment

Top 10 List: Riding in the Wind

Top 10 Wind List:

The advantages of not having an indoor arena on the flat, windy, treeless plains of Colorado.

10. Less time is spent working the arena -as all hoof prints are erased hourly, along with the top inch of sand.

9. Wind helps with the spring grooming -working like a brand new shedding blade.

8. Riding with feel is increased as your goggles get covered with dust, or you simply ride  with your eyes closed one direction .

7. Un-cued, near…

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Added by Anna Blake on April 1, 2011 at 8:00am — No Comments

Horse Love notes

Just a couple of short little love notes.



The horse speaks directly into our soul, instantly bypassing, beyond the everyday suffering and pain of human endurance, and migrate directly into our beating hearts . Love roberta marie edstrom



"When I bestride him, I soar, I am a hawk: he trots the air; the earth sings when he touches it; the basest horn of his hoof is more musical than the pipe of Hermes." ...Henry V. -Shakespeare.



"Within… Continue

Added by Roberta Edstrom on November 20, 2010 at 8:30am — 1 Comment

Ladies: if you buy a Roping saddle, buy a vibrator too, you'll need one

For years, I bought, sold, repaired and even made a few western saddles. I loved to carve leather, so I would spend hours, days, and even weeks making elaborate designs on the fenders, swells and skirts.



Here is the funny thing, I was like the shoe maker who did not own a pair of his own shoes.



Neither did my husband.…



Daily Oats: Don't lope in a Roper Continue

Added by Roberta Edstrom on September 27, 2010 at 1:00pm — 1 Comment

Stable relationships

For me, this one is the longest training program that I have ever been involved in.

How to keep your stable neat and tidy.

I have a wonderful friend that I met back in the spring of 1969. Well, that sure dates me. But from the moment I meet her, I could see that her horses were her number one priority in her life. I have seen that woman, even at the age of 60 plus, rise early every morning, muck out the stalls, wash out the water buckets, measure the feed for every horse, clean… Continue

Added by Roberta Edstrom on September 8, 2010 at 4:22pm — 1 Comment

The wheelbarrow

I know it has happened to all of us at one time or another. I know that it has happened to me a lot over the years. I clean out one stall, head for the next and think I can just put one more pitch fork of manure on top. Just one more. And if that one stays, I just might try one more. I can do it, just one more.



Now it is past full to the brim and I may have hit the tipping point. The point of no return. I know I have reached it when I first notice that the tire is starting to look a… Continue

Added by Roberta Edstrom on September 6, 2010 at 12:26am — 1 Comment

The Inimitable Eddie Izzard's Take On Riding



I particularly like the horse whispering part, and the one where the children come with their own… Continue

Added by Kimberly Cox Carneal on August 8, 2010 at 11:00pm — 2 Comments

Sigh. Ah well, there is ice cream...


... and I did ride my horse for the first time! *happy dance* :D


Added by Ferrous on April 17, 2010 at 10:00am — 7 Comments

Skinny Dipping Anyone?

Well,you never know what you will run into on a trail ride anymore.....a few days back,the weather was nice and I had finished early with my farm chores ,training,so before going home I thought,I am going to saddle up my QH mare Risky and go for a nice ride along the river on my friend's farm.

It was wonderful being out on my favorite horse,slight breeze,sun shining,birds singing.Great day to be alive...just my horse and…

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Added by Connie Breedveld on April 12, 2010 at 9:56pm — 6 Comments

Don't feed your horse Carrots

Comments from the old mare.



I just wanted to introduce myself, I am the old mare in the corner stall and I have a few things to say.



1st. Stop! bringing home all those new horses to "MY" barn.



Enough is enough. Have "YOU" ever herd of the #ONE ?



Am I not good enough for "YOU" anymore and…

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Added by Roberta Edstrom on April 4, 2010 at 3:00am — No Comments

Large Lurking Lagomorph

A notice to all horses, beware and keep an eye on your carrots!

There have been sightings of a large rabbit lurking in human-yards around the globe. He has been seen carrying a basket full of eggs, so I fear that he has already stolen from the hens. Take care to guard your carrots... this rabbit seems to be planning something big this weekend!

Added by Nocturnis LeNoir on April 2, 2010 at 10:55am — 1 Comment

Never barrel race your pleasure horse



It has rained for three days just prior to the our club's yearly horse show. Everything was under water when we arrived. A few of the men rounded-up some shovels and dug some trenches to help drain the water from the Arena.

I hung out with a few other rides, and we sat along side of the arena, just waiting for someone to hit the dirt. We were actually taking bets on which rider would be the dirtiest by the end of the day. Not good, I know, but this was in my younger, more naive… Continue

Added by Roberta Edstrom on April 1, 2010 at 9:32am — No Comments

Urgent notice: Potential Danger of Horse Hair

Urgent Notice:



Potential Danger of Horse Hair in a press release today, the National Institute of Health has announced the discovery of a potentially dangerous substance in the hair of horses.



This substance, called "amobacter equuii" has been linked with the following symptoms in females:* Reluctance to cook, clean or do housework.* Reluctance to wear make-up, good clothes or

heels.* Reluctance to spend money on home or car repairs until after "baby has new… Continue

Added by Roberta Edstrom on February 19, 2010 at 10:54am — 6 Comments

Hey it's a hospital. No horses allowed!

AP News Sun Mar 23, 2:07 AM ET LIHUE, Hawaii



A man hoping to cheer up an ailing relative at Wilcox Memorial Hospital hadn't considered one of the visitation rules: No horses allowed.



The man thought the patient would enjoy seeing his stallion, said Lani Yukimura, a spokeswoman at the hospital. He and the horse entered the hospital earlier this month and rode an elevator up to the third floor, where they were met and stopped by security personnel, Security managed to get… Continue

Added by Barbara F. on April 30, 2008 at 5:00pm — 1 Comment

Checklist: Kids who ride horses have the best slumber parties...

A bit off topic, but I thought you guys might enjoy this:

Slumber party checklist:

Dining room table littered with remnants of 43 million gram carbohydrate breakfast of giant frosted muffins ~ check

Giant tent construction surrounded by possibly hazardous tween rubbish in second bedroom ~ check

Teens woke up late and were distraught that the tweens took the best muffins and ate most of the eggs ~ check

Teens blissfully unaware…

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Added by Robin Grantham on March 8, 2008 at 11:26am — 4 Comments

Space Shuttle Design determined by the Horse's Ass!

History and knowledge never go away.

Be sure to read the final paragraph, but your understanding of it will

depend on the earlier part of the content.

The US standard railroad gauge (distance between the rails) is 4 feet, 8.5 inches. That's an exceedingly odd number.

Why was that gauge used? Because that's the way they built them in England , and English expatriates built the US…

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Added by Linda Weldon on February 29, 2008 at 11:14am — 1 Comment

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